Whenever the topic of jail/arrests/crimes comes up (which is more frequent than you would think), the following is usually the most likely thing to come out of my mouth: “I would do everything possible to be thrown in to solitary confinement for the duration. I am too pretty. I know I could handle solitary because my imagination is so vivid.” I am just kidding about the pretty part, although you know you want a piece; the Transistor Radio is a delicate flower.
Two things, I know I would get my @$$ beat down (and worse things which I won’t mention), and I actually do believe in my mind’s ability to keep myself sane without human contact. I think day dreaming, wandering my mind’s eye, contemplating random possibilities keeps me mentally sane. This world discourages rampant imagination when it should be doing the opposite.
I’ve had some crazy thoughts in my time, but that is precisely why it’s okay. They are just thoughts. Those thoughts, however, allow me to explore emotions that I wouldn’t otherwise explore.
I have the common dreams; if I die, who will come to my funeral and what would they say. I also have the uncommon, or at least society says they are uncommon: what would happen if I flew off my rocker and just murdered every one. These are the extremes, but I also think of day to day stuff. I’ll imagine that someone asks me how I am doing, and instead of the standard “fine” I will respond with “Horrible! The worst day ever, can you just hold me?”
I explore myself in the safety and comfort of my own head. If I don’t like where something is going, I can just stop it and change that decision and make it happy. We live in a world where so many different rules get in the way of who we want to be, or maybe I should say who we might be. There is societal rules, political correctness, tact, other people’s feelings, etc. I don’t want to make waves, but I like to dream about what would happen if I did.
This is my plea, take an hour and revisit any moment in your life and picture it from every angle. It can only help you be mentally healthy.
Dream on, dear reader, dream on!
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